Wednesday, October 12, 2005

The Long Way Around

There is a expressway I drive on a few times a week on my way to work, various kid activities and such. There is one point when you crest a hill and you can see the Rochester skyline stretched out before you. It looks not quite close enough to reach out and touch but it is there. So clear. So close. You swear it will only take minutes more to reach it.

Every single time I crest this hill I think the same thing. Every single time. (I'm kind of afraid what this says about me.) It's so close.

The thing is, you don't drive straight there. To reach the city you must take another road. One that seems to lead you away from your destination. It curves around with no city in sight. Fields and trees and not much else to see. Then, just as you are convinced you are about to miss the city altogether you take a sharp left onto yet another road and there you are. In the city, with all it's welcome signs and horses painted in flag motifs.

I realized the other day that this is how my life has been playing out. You see the goal. It seems like a clear cut path but then... WAIT, sidetracked onto another road, heading in a different direction. WAIT, go this way. No, that way. When it seems you have lost sight of the goal, it is suddenly there before you with it's welcome signs and horses on their hind legs, parts exposed.*

That is my life. And now, looking back a bit, I've decided I like it that way. Much more interesting. Much more opportunity to learn new things. Much more experience to draw on.

At the same time, I'm still wanting to take that straight path. The one that will take me to my goal in just a couple of minutes. Even when I know it is not for the best. Even when I know that my life was meant to be spent meandering back and forth and forward and back. The goal seems to change and yet pops up again when you least expect it. It's so AGGRAVATING!!!

I guess this is one of those constant struggles we all deal with. What we want and what we know is for the best.

Is there a struggle like this that you deal with? Let me know in the comments section or link to your own post about this subject.

*Only those from the Rochester area will get this reference. For the rest of you click here.

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