School

Hello world! Yes, it is I, lovable, furry, old Grover. No wait, I'm not Grover. Nor very lovable. However, old and furry may apply. I'm just saying.

The first day of school was yesterday and I realized next year there will be just one. One lonely child to send off to high school. It is weird. And quiet. And there are already times I don't know what to do with myself. Which is probably why I applied to grad school.

Yep, grad school. I've been accepted and started my first class. I'm guessing it will take me at least four years to finish. If I finish. I have no real goal in mind. I'm not looking for a new career. In fact, starting over sounds exhausting. But, I've been wanted to take classes since I started working here at RIT and now I finally feel like I can make the time to do it.

The other thing with getting a degree and being in a position to start over is I will be almost fifty. FIVE. ZERO. Do companies hire people who are fifty and new to a field? I feel like they probably don't. But, well, what do I have to lose? It will keep me busy and keep me in excuses for not cleaning my house. Clean? I can't. I have homework.

(And now you see my real motivation.)

Tiny Houses

Since the whole November posting thing didn't work as it was intended, I kept all of Kim's prompts and will use them when I feel the need to write something. And today? I feel the need to write something, anything.

This summer I became obsessed with the whole tiny house movement. Now I don't think Jeff and I could ever live in a tiny home permanently. I mean, where would we put all of the children when they came to visit?  (And they better visit.) But when the house is full of people and all of their things, it is sort of daydreamy to imagine living in something that takes a couple of hours to scrub top to bottom and only have minimal stuff to put away. I also like the closeness. (Most days.) I even have a whole board on Pinterest devoted to the things. I have dreamed of building one in the clearing out back when the kids all move out. We can live there and open up "the big house" when people come to stay/holidays/etc.

The prompt is this:

Someone's paying you to move into one of those tiny house everyone is talking about. If you can survive a whole year in that house with just the things on this list, you get a bajillion dollars. Tell us how you fill in this List Of Things You Can Take With You:

• 5 books - I'm going to cheat here... my kindle. So as many books as exist taking up the space of one. Oh, and a sketchbook and a notebook.
• 3 outfits - Jeans, t-shirt, sweater, socks & black boots; yoga pants, t-shirt, sweatshirt, socks, sneakers; Skirt, flowy shirt, sweater, sandals. This is rough though. I'd like to think I could have more than 3 shirts and 1 pair of jeans.
• You have a fridge/stove/oven - but you can only take 1 counter-top appliance - My percolator for coffee. I can handle no microwave but don't mess with my percolator!
• 1 DVD collection of a TV show (your budget doesn't allow for Netflix) - It would have to be Gilmore Girls. I can rewatch that forever. 
• 1 childhood artifact - Meh. Don't need one. I'll take an extra outfit instead. Or, at least another pair of jeans.
• They will give you ONE subscription to a magazine - what is it? - Again, meh. But if I had to choose? Probably something like Entertainment Weekly. Can I trade this for a pair of flip-flops?

I've been trying to decide what the one thing I would have to bring would be. I mean, for this exercise I'm done but we all have that one thing we would need. One thing that serves no practical purpose but we just need to have. And right now, for the life of me, I can't figure out what it would be. My ipod? I'm assuming I'll have my phone as we aren't talking about moving into a cave on a deserted island. So maybe just put some music on that. I'm not a huge music person so that would probably be plenty. I don't know. So, what would you bring to your tiny house and what is one thing not listed you would HAVE to have?

Where in the World

is would you go?

I've decided to use another of Miss Zoot's prompts. This one is about travel. Assuming you have unlimited funds to make this year/month/week EXACTLY how you'd want it to be. And when you come back - your job is waiting for you. Where would you go:

If you could spend ONE WEEK anywhere in the world, where would you go?

One week... I've always wanted to spend a week at some exotic beach resort with frozen drinks and no kids. Warm breezes and that blue, blue water you see in all the ads. Just a beach, a frosty drink and either my husband or my girls. The word of the week would be RELAX. Oh, and no forgetting the kindle.

If you could spend ONE MONTH anywhere in the world, where would you go?

My new travel obsession is Greece. I have no idea why beyond those blue waters and white houses on the hills. Cliffs? Mountains? Whatever they are. It will take me a month to get used to all the stairs but it will only take a moment to get used to the delicious, delicious food. A month would give me time to explore, relax, create, eat, and just soak in the atmosphere. The light there makes me want to take up painting or drawing or my camera.

If you could spend ONE YEAR anywhere in the world, where would you go?

This is a hard one. I like my house and my life and a whole year away would make me sad. But, if I had to go for a year it would be with a flight to Europe and a Eurail Global Pass. That covers 24 countries. Of course, I'd have to add England and Scotland. Money is no object! Isn't that what the prompt says? So all those places! A year should be enough time. Oh, do I get to travel with an interpreter? I'm going to need one of those.

Tell me where you would go in the comments! Or put a link to your blog post about this in the comments. Please! I want to know.

Tattoos

10/16:
Weather report: Absolutely gorgeous! Sidenote: Fog this morning was insane.

I've reread the posts I've been writing and realized I've forgotten how to do this. Apparently practice is key and I've fallen way, way out of practice. I have decided not to give up. I shall keep writing and maybe, if we're all lucky, I'll get better at this. Or at least not make anyone want to vomit at my words.

Tonight is the last JV soccer game of the season. As fall sports come to a close in our house a sigh of relief can be heard. It hasn't snowed and no freezing rain. This may be a first. Global warming - it's real, yo.

10/21:
Weather report: The rain has arrived.

It seems the doubt from the realization my writing is crap has kept me from practicing after all. I shall no longer look back. Onward!

JV soccer ended the season 13-3. Pretty great record if you ask me. And now on to the winter sport portion of the year. That would be ski team and swimming for those of you (mom) following along at home.

I managed to see both of my older children today. Tattoos are healing well. Having to bring them mail and groceries are a great excuse to see them now and then. It seems they have entered the buckle down portion of the semester. Grades were doing well and now the workload is increasing. I hope they can keep it up.

So tattoos... yes. If you follow me on Twitter or Facebook you will see we had a family tattoo day on Saturday. EIGHT of us got tattooed. Those getting inked for the first time included my husband, oldest child, second child, and my MIL. Those getting 3rd or 4th tattoos were myself, SIL#1, SIL#2, and Alex's girlfriend. It was a long day. We had people along for moral support though. Tyler's girlfriend was present as was our youngest. Also, "adopted" child Brenden showed and even brought the new girlfriend around for introductions.

The first time tattoo(ees?) were surprised it hurt so much. I'm thinking that is my fault though. I am known to have a VERY low tolerance for pain. I mean I am quite the wuss. I accept this. It is what it is. However, I now have 4 tattoos. And yes, I always say, they HURT. But I'm thinking the people in my life didn't realize how MUCH it hurts. It was eye opening for some. And, I'd like to think I upped my street cred just a bit. Maybe that should be house cred. since they mostly live in my house at least part time and no one on the street knows.

I love October. It is usually sunny and not too cold and just beautiful where we live. But as the days get shorter, my bedtime gets earlier and I have a harder time waking up in the morning. I'm tired. I was thinking something was wrong until I remembered I think that every year. I just have to get past this adjustment period where the extended darkness tells my internal clock it's time to sleep. I may be counting the hours between when I can nest in my bed and read/sleep. Maybe.

Time is up! Time to publish. From now on it is writing and publishing. No thinking allowed.

Outlander

So the rain has arrived. Luckily it is still fairly warm. And that is all for your daily weather report.

Why do I feel it necessary to give a weather report? I have no idea but I really do. Always.

In other news, work is very busy. I love when work is busy. I love when I am busy and have lots to do. I get to do spreadsheets and grids and my job really is the perfect job for me. And I didn't want to kill anyone today! There was a small chance of a strangulation. Or two. Maybe three. But for the most part, everyone is a delight. And even those I think of strangling I usually like.

Let's see...
I've been re-reading the Outlander series by Diana Gabaldon. It is taking FOREVER. That is both good and bad. Good - I love it. I don't want it to end. BUT, I keep thinking I'd like to take a break and read something else but I'm afraid I'll lose all of the various threads of the story. I am finally reading a book I hadn't read yet, An Echo In The Bone (Book 7). I put it off when it was released because I couldn't remember what had happened in the others.

Last time I read the whole series it was as each book was released. I remember not really enjoying A Breath of Snow and Ashes (Book 6). I remember thinking it was much too wordy (992 pages! Seriously!). But, this time I have to say, I really enjoyed it. So once I'm done with this one (only 850 pages!) I'll only have one book left in the series!

I started reading them in JULY. Yes, I have spent the last FOUR MONTHS reading these books. And I'm guessing... it might take me until the end of the year to finish the main series. (There are also some novellas and tangent novels she's written that I haven't read either.) I have a feeling when I'm done I'm going to want some short, quick one offs!

Oh, and Outlander has been made into a TV show. IT. IS. SO. GOOD. It is on Starz so it may be difficult to get but it is worth it. The first half of the season has been on and the second half will be in the Spring. And, it already got renewed for next season. Book 2, Dragonfly in Amber, will be the second season. The book I really want to see on screen is Voyager (the 3rd book). I never realized how funny Voyager was. I have decided it is my favorite.

Oh, and if you're on Goodread's, friend me (hmdavis). I'd love to see what you're reading. And as always, you can always talk books here on the blog.

Warm weather, do not leave us. Please.

It is the type of day outside that makes you look for reasons to stay outside. Highs in the low 80's, warm winds, brightly colored leaves and just gorgeous. Also, probably the last day it will be this warm until June. Everyone is prolonging lunches and taking walks and trying to avoid their desks. I'm not sure how anyone can tell people not to do this. It is too nice and it will be too long before we enjoy this again. (This is until Mother Nature decides to prove us all wrong and does it again just to spite us and this narrative.)

So I mentioned two of the offspring are in college. I did not lie. They are both attending the same college. They both live on campus. They both have girlfriends. They both seem happy.

What else is there to say? One is a journalism major and the other Physics. Yes, I know... physics. Insane. I always wondered if he was really mine. Now I'm sure he was switched in the hospital.

Life, it sounds so calm. It sounds so delightful and accomplished. It sounds like we are winning at parenting. (Not to worry, we're not.) The problem with teenagers is their stories are their own. But just know we all have our issues. I worry about them all in different ways. I'm still hoping they all grow to be happy, productive members of society. I'm hoping we all make it out of the teenage years alive. Do not laugh, there are days I wonder.

I can say, the house is so quiet now. So much calmer. So much less laundry! So many less groceries! I'm not sure why the bills aren't going down though. Can I ask? Why are groceries so much more expensive? How did this happen without me noticing? The past year has been insane! Am I the only one this is happening to?

A story I can tell is my story. A story of a surprisingly happy marriage. A story of settling into life a bit more. A story of (hopefully) coming into my own. I will try to focus things there.

Hello there.

 It's been... a super long time. It's also been massive losses of past content and the ditching of my domain.

Not sure what I'm doing here but felt the need? desire? itch? to write something here. I've been denying it for weeks but have let the blank page cower me. I've let the terrible photo below mock me as the last thing I contributed to the internet.

I found while moving my archives over that my favorite posts are reading about what was going on when. Things I had forgotten remembered. The whole reason I started this thing.

So, we're going back to basics. No design to fiddle with. No domain to keep up. No brand or advertising or anything. (Not that I had any of those things.)

Just me writing.

Writing about one of the littles, the older of the littles. The little whose birthday is today. The little who is officially SIXTEEN.

He may not be so little anymore.

So now I have two children in college. IN. COLLEGE. And two children in high school.

Where are those adorable little boys? Where are they? All I have now are young men who are all taller than me. All taller than their dad. Smelly and busy and all doing their own thing.

People ask how they are and I don't know what to say. Alive. Still in school. Still doing what they do.

To be fair, Dylan started swimming. As in the swim team. I haven't seen him swim yet but he seems to really like it. Like leaves the house at 5:45 AM to go to the pool. Without prodding likes it.

Dylan also had a roll in the school musical last Spring. He's worked backstage for the last few years but decided to try his hand on stage. He amazed me. He danced. He sang. He had his own lines and was funny.

Zach is on the JV soccer team, the ski team and the baseball team. He is also involved in several clubs. I'm not sure I even know all the clubs he's involved with. I usually find out at some crucial moment when he needs a permission slip signed (Math Team) or a coat for the coat drive he helped spearhead (Community service club). Who knows what else he's involved with. He is a total overachiever. He does NOT take after his mother in this area.

And here I'll leave off for today. I must pick Zach up from soccer practice and check on Dylan and his Trig homework.

Hitchhiker

This little guy snagged a ride on my side mirror this morning. He rode all the way to work (about 25 miles). I wonder if he knew the adventure he was in for when he decided to hang out here. I wonder if he knew he'd never see his family again. Or if he was eaten by something as soon as I left the car in the parking lot. Or if he was run over trying to find his way home. Or maybe, he found a new home and some new friends and is having the time of his life right now.

It seems I have a lot to say...

The rain has been making me crazy and cranky and pairing that with PMS has made me what I'm sure is unbearable. Luckily the sun popped out yesterday while I was driving home and this morning on my ride in to work. I am much happier now. Also, a fabulous woman in the office made mini carrot cake cupcakes for another coworker's birthday today. That has made me smile. And eat. And maybe just one more because they are so small.

Alas, the sun has gone and more rain is expected. Have I mentioned how over the rain I am? It seems as if it will never dry out around here. The ark jokes are not even funny anymore.

The new house is lovely. I even bought some plants for the yard. Yes, it seems it's my year to garden. Maybe. I find I am willing to dig in the dirt about every five years. So as soon AS THE SUN RETURNS I will be digging. I hope it goes well since this will probably be it for many years.

The plants came from Flower Days at the Public Market. Somehow I've never attended this flower filled event. Unbelievable I know! I've lived in this area for about TWENTY YEARS... my God, am older than dirt... and never managed a trip downtown for the event. It of course it was cold and rainy on Sunday. The good news was it wasn't very crowded because of this. Even without the crowds I got very overwhelmed and probably would have left without buying anything but luckily I brought a friend who kept me calm. We did a walk through to survey the goods and then went back and purchased what we wanted. Let me just say, that was the perfect way to handle it. One, no carrying heavy pots around and two, better to price things and narrow down before actually purchasing. Still, by the end of the walk through I was completely overwhelmed and not sure what to buy. I had to refocus on what I originally wanted and then picked up a few annuals at the booths I was already buying from.

So what did I get? Well, the big purchase was two gorgeous Rhododendrons in the traditional light purple. They had some lovely maroonish ones but I decided to stick with the traditional that reminded me of my youth (so important in us ancient ones). I picked up a bunch of basil, mint and coriander. Also got some gerber daisies, poppies and begonias. Why have I never taken notice of begonias before? They were amazing! So lovely. Maybe once I get them in the ground or the rain stops falling I'll take some photos to put up here.

In other news, I've been baking tons with my new kitchenaid (thanks honey for the Mother's Day gift!!!) and new double oven. The kids are thrilled with the baking of course because it means yummy treats for them. The scale however is very unhappy with me. Well, too bad scale. I'm having fun, enjoying homemade treats and making people smile.

I've also gotten even more crunchy. We're still composting and recycling of course but now our garbage pickup takes even more recycling then the old one. We are down to about 2 - 13 gallon kitchen bags a week. For six people! And even then, one of them is usually not full. Also, there are still always extra people and kids around. I was a little worried that the kids would stop showing up now that we live further from school but that has not been the case. I'm so glad. I love having people hanging out everywhere. Makes me happy. (Plus, more excuses to bake!)

Oh, and on the crunchy front I'm going natural with cleaners and a steam mop to go along with the cloth napkins, hand towels and old rags instead of paper towels and napkins. I'm thinking I'll be making my own laundry and dish detergent soon. I know! Who am I?

The boxes are slowly getting unpacked. So far my cake pans and measuring cup seem to have gone missing in the move but those I can definitely replace. The living room hasn't been touched. Except the other night I hung a bunch of pictures on the nails left behind from the previous owners. Then I made Jeff take them all down because they were giving me anxiety. Yes, he agrees, I'm a freak. I have no idea why but I couldn't stand them hanging just randomly like that. I prefer them in a box until I have a plan of some sort.

The bedrooms are mostly done. The kitchen is done. The rest? Well, we're getting there. I haven't even started painting yet! I did manage to change the hardware in the kitchen though. It made it so much calmer and updated looking.

Sorry about the poor quality of the photos. The one that is probably the closest to how they look in real life is the bottom right. So the top two? Shiny worn brass that came with the house. NOT my style at all. Bottom two? Antique pewter. Ahhhh, anxiety gone. And the change also totally toned down the oak color. Looks much more mellow now. Now, tell me what you think...

My Taste

So I'm finding I really enjoy light, white, pink flowers, glass and cast iron accents. This is what is gleaned so far from pinterest. Never realized I liked white so much. Too bad I have all those dirty boys to house or I could try living like that a bit.

In other news, no takers of our house. Seems people don't even want to come look at it.

And if you'd like to know how my weekend is to begin, not with my pj's, a glass of wine and bad, canceled tv shows via netflix streaming. No, it's me racing home to take a certain 12 y/o to have his wrist x-rayed. In a snowboard accident last night he injured his wrist and although I thought it was just a strain - "Ice! Advil! Rest!" - the school nurse seems to think it warrants an x-ray. She even filled out a bunch of paperwork to PAY for the x-ray since it happened on a school sponsored trip. The doctor's office also feels confident enough that it is necessary to not warrant an appointment with them first. So I'm once again a neglectful parent for downplaying the whole incident.

www.pinterest.com

This is a fabulous site for putting together a sort of virtual mood board, or inspiration board or whatever you want to call it. I'm using it to post things that inspire me, things that I find beautiful etc. I'm hoping that at some point I'll be able to see a pattern and it may help me to decorate my house. You know, whichever house we end up in.

My mind, in bullets so you don't get lost

So, things on my mind...

• I love, love, love Old Navy's Dreamer jeans. I forgot how wonderful it is to wear jeans that don't gap in the back. In fact, I want to buy more and just toss out all my other pants.


• I won - Thank you Cursingmama! - a copy of The Mayo Clinic Diet book & journal over at her review blog. I also started it even though it cautions to wait until a good time. The week before Easter is decidedly NOT a good time. As I have mentioned every single year on this blog, my favorite candy in all the world is only available at Easter. The first two weeks (the Lose It! portion) you are suppose to give up sugar. Hahahahaha. Yo, that shit is hard. I've done... ok. Not perfect but not nearly as bad as I would have been if I wasn't doing this. Also? I have to decided to eat as much candy as I want on Easter. For one day. I will be in a sugar coma. Then? I might extend the first 2 weeks for one more. We shall see.


• As anyone who follows me on twitter already knows, I had my annual review yesterday at work and it has been decided I'm full of the awesome. As for a raise, extremely minimal merit raises are being offered up. I for one am glad to have a job. Not that we couldn't use the money but I'd rather have no one lose their job.


• Found out a friend from high school is in the hospital with an infection around his heart... from twitter. Twitter FTW! (As for the other business on twitter. Suck it, don't suck it, I'm out of caring. Although, thanks for the entertainment.) As for my friend, I'm seriously worried. He is one of the kindest people I've ever met and we just reconnected. Get well Alan!

Child update for the related people and grandparents out there reading - non-related and non-grandparents, do not feel the need to read my annoying gushing. (I must gush when I can because usually I'm just complaining about them):

• Alex played for the Varsity baseball team during a scrimmage the other day. He was not nervous. I was a wreck. He held his own though. It's his first year catching and he's doing great but has some stuff to work on. What? I don't know - see: not informed about sports. Still, the coaches seem to like him and he's getting the hang of it.


• Tyler made the JV golf team. He's very excited and we are very proud. Now we need to invest in a membership for him at the local golf course.


• The last parent-teacher conference ever for Dylan was the only one where the teacher had nothing negative to say. Only lovely words were spoken. And his grades are higher than they've ever been. Also, it has been agreed by all that Jr. High should be good for him. Apparently letting him almost flunk out last term worked. He's getting all his homework done at school now. Now if he would just let me cut his hair.


• Zach. What to say about him. He's a bit sassy. A bit whiny. All brilliant and still adorable. Baseball starts next week.


• The 3 youngest have all signed up for the mini-triathlon again.


• Clearly none of these children are related to me.

New Year's Eve 2009

This is for Carmi over at Written Inc. He does a thematic photo every week and this week I thought I'd hop in. The theme is What I Did On Vacation and he has a very similar photo posted. I just couldn't resist adding my version of "They don't always get along as peacefully as we'd like. They're bright, creative and engaged kids, so it's inevitable that they have their moments - with each other and with us. But sometimes, when the stars align, they manage to make our hearts melt." Yes, Carmi writes that beautifully. And yes, I totally stole his words there. Feel free to join in!

Bullets!

My brain is so full I just haven't known where to start. So I will just start...

• My kids got into the honors classes they wanted. Tuesday was their first day. So far, so good. We will see. I will say they are happy about it. And, they both had homework to do last night. A first this year. And as you might assume, the homework was in their honors classes. So yes, they have more work but no, it doesn't seem too difficult for them. I think I'm liking being THAT mom.


• I have officially started my holiday shopping. Hold me.


• Little snow flakes are showing up in my weather app on my Google homepage. Not for today but for Friday and Saturday. I have heard there was a sighting of flakes this morning. f.l.a.k.e.s. Not happy. Not ready. And yes, our heat is on already. I do not compete in your furnace wars you foolish ones. I like to be warm. In related news, the kids are still complaining it's cold in the house.


• It seems the children and I are battling a cold. I'm not sure who is winning at this point.


• SQUEE! GLEE! is on tonight.


• I have now downloaded all 16 Glee songs that are available on Amazon. I may have a sickness. I will not tell you how many times I have listened to Gold Digger on my ipod. There is however a need to point out the absolute brilliance of Mercedes' (Amber Riley's) opening of that song. If you have not heard it? I would like to offer my condolences.


• The Halloween costumes have been procured. Only 2 of the children still want to dress up. The other two are wearing masks. At least, that is what they tell me when I say they can't go beg for candy without some kind of costume. I have also bought extra masks. What are the two littles going to be? A repeat of Indiana Jones that necessitated a new whip and hat. (Old whip was broken and old hat is too small for his GIANT 11 year old noggin.) The littlest little is going to be Dr. Horrible. I predict no one here will know who he is. Except me and the boys. I am okay with this.


• The invites for our Halloween party have not been printed.


• The garage has not been cleaned.


• I predict it will not be warm like it was last year. I predict rain and cold and snow. Glad we had the roof replaced. Also, Jeff ripped out the ceiling and the beams are now exposed making the garage extra spooky. Also, the cobwebs add ambiance. Do not try to dissuade me of this fact.


• I got a call from one of the children telling me he had to stay after school for the next 3 days to make up something or other in band. BAND. Fine, whatever.


• I got another call two hours later telling me he was home and skipped out on his detention that "is not really a detention." I do not even know what to do with this information.


• Anyone who knows any of my children can identify this particular child. I shall not name names here. Although he may have had a birthday recently.


• One of the children keeps crying. Over EVERYTHING. Surely not everything you say. Yes, EVERYTHING. It is making me weary. Also? I hate nine. Nine and boys do not go together well.

That is all. I have things to do and loins to gird. I'm not sure I want to go home tonight.

What's been going on here?

Last week was great fun around these parts. First off the kids were on Spring break. Secondly, the husband was out of state for the majority of the week and lastly, I almost died from a head cold.

Okay, so I didn't almost die. I had a cold. I was sick enough to be sent home from work early on Thursday and stayed home Friday. Unfortunately, the time I didn't take as vacation because I  HAD to work, I spent on my couch alternating between begging the children to let me sleep and barking orders for them to clean the house. It seemed every time I fell asleep someone would come in and wake me. EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. When I finally gave up, I tried to get them to clean the downstairs because we were having company Saturday night. Needless to say, some of the children complied. Some did not. And then I died.

Or, recovered enough to enjoy having two families over for dinner on Saturday night. Now two families may sound small and manageable but if said families were all crazy and all produced 4 offspring each... well, that's a whole lot of people.

One of ours was gone to a birthday party and another was away at college (not one of ours). That left us with six adults and ten children. Yeah. TEN. They ranged in age from six to fifteen. I would just like to praise Mother Nature for holding out on the rain that was predicted. The kids spent the majority of the night outside playing laser tag and chasing each other around outside. Yay Mother Nature! You go girl!

My husband declared the night, "Jewing it up night." We served matzoh ball soup, challah, hummus, matzoh, potato knish, applesauce, sour cream, He-brew beer, wine and salad. One family brought venison and the other brought latkes.

You should know, we live in a small town. We are one of three Jewish families that I know of. The kids only know two other Jewish students in their school. To say they are celebrities in their classes would be accurate. Their dad always did the Hanukkah demonstration in Primary school and the fact they get eight days of gifts makes them rock stars. When the oldest had his Bar Mitzvah it was the event of the year. I'm not niave enough to believe there is no hate but for the most part I believe my kids have positive experiences living in the situation they do.

So anyway, we are what I call Jewish-lite. We do not keep kosher. We do eat bread during Passover. We celebrate the secular aspects of Christmas and Easter. The kids do go to Temple and Sunday school. They attend Hebrew school and see their tutor every week while preparing for their Bar Mitzvahs. We discuss mitzvahs (good deeds) and tzedakah (charity) and try to make these part of our daily lives. So, Jewish-lite. Say what you may but this works for us and I think many families take what works for them from their religion and leave the rest. This is what works for us.

So, we have many friends that are not Jewish. We have friends that are curious. We needed a good excuse to all get together. Well, not really NEEDED an excuse. But with the business of 4 kids each, we needed a push. My husband gave us that push and I'm so glad he did. It was great fun. The kids are all friends and got along great AND the adults all get along really well. I find it is rare for that to happen. Men getting along and wives and kids. It's taken a long time for us to find this dynamic but I'm so glad we did.

Now for a string of non-related strange facts about our little group:

• The other two couples have been together since High School. Seriously. HIGH. SCHOOL. Yes, I find that odd.


• The men are all engineers. I guess that's not odd as I seem to know in inordinate amount of engineers and not just through my husband. But still, what's with all the engi-nerds? (heh, my pet name for them)


• We do not have the oldest child or the youngest but our kids are the closest in age.


• All the adults are between 38 & 41 and our kids ages are: 20, 15, 14, 14, 12, 12, 10, 9, 8, 8, 6, 6. The only ones without friends in the group are the 20 & 10 year olds. (they also happen to be the two not present)


• I have also now shown my highly nerdy need for numbers. They fascinate me. It's a sickness.


• I cannot fathom having a 20 year old nor a 6 year old. One of the couples has both. They are also not the oldest.


• I told you it was a sickness.


• Out of 12 children there are only 2 girls. 14 and 6. Two different families. Neither is mine. (You should all already know this random fact.)


• SICKNESS.


• Maybe I should take a statistics course.


• Also, it does not escape my notice that I called them engi-nerds and I'm here with the number sickness.

To wrap up here I will say that school is FINALLY back in session today after a extra day off yesterday for an unused snow day. And do NOT get me started on the fact that the kids had school on a day when several buses slid off the road - one containing one of my children - only to have 2 snow days left over now.

Routine, it is good.

Choices

It seems like the subject of choices keeps coming up lately.

I've always tried to teach my children that life is a series of choices. You can choose to do what I ask or deal with the punishment. You can choose to to quit band but then you have to take music in Junior High. You can choose to yell in my face but then you'll also get slapped. Then there are other choices. Harder choices.

If you don't like how something is going you have to choose to change it. If you think you are fat - which, BTW,  I don't agree with - you need to not eat as much ice cream after dinner. Have a piece of fruit. Make healthier food choices. If you want to save your money for a big purchase maybe you shouldn't go to the ice cream shop with your friends. If you want to play sports you need to keep your grades up. That means taking 20 minutes the night before a test and studying.

The thing is, we make choices constantly. Sometimes it doesn't seem like a choice because we feel so strongly one way or another. We may even say we didn't have a choice. But we almost always do. Yes, things happen that we can't change but we can change our response. Or not. Our choice. We may not like our choices but we still get to choose between them. We may like both our choices. Many times it's between what our heart wants and what our head wants. And by heart I do not just mean love. Sometimes heart refers to our gut or our wants or the child within us. By head I'm referring to the logical choice.

It's not always easy letting your kids make their own choices. Especially if you feel strongly about the outcome. Sometimes it's still necessary to let them do the choosing. Sometimes it is not at all appropriate to let them have the final decision. No, you may not kill your brother so he will stop annoying you. I don't care if you decide it is worth the punishment. No, you may not quit school and work at McDonald's for the rest of your life. You can decide to work there but you will finish school so you have the choice later.

I believe in the handing over of decisions along with the conversation of what results of the choices will be. I am not above gentle nudging. I am not above the suggestion of postponement of certain decisions. Finish band this year, you only have 2 months left then you can decide about next year later.

The hardest part of letting the kids make choices is letting them make what you feel are the wrong choices. I'm not sure how I will handle that. I've been very lucky so far in that they haven't gone against anything I feel extremely strong about. But we are still working on realizing that some of the things that happen have been their choice. You wouldn't go to your room when you were told and now I have to drag you. One of the boys accused us of almost ripping his arm out of the socket when trying to drag him upstairs to bed one night. I said that all he had to do was choose to walk and that wouldn't have happened/would have stopped. He just looked at me.

In the boys' defense, I think they are coming along nicely in the learning to make choices department. Hell, I even have to take the time to remind myself when I'm unhappy that I am choosing this. Every time I eat when I'm not hungry, every time I eat large amounts of fattening foods I am choosing to be fat. I'm not a victim of genetics or medications or physical ailments. I am fat because of what I eat. This is not to say that others don't have these issues to deal with - they do - this is just to qualify my particular situation. In my life, it is my choices that have resulted in the fat. If nothing else, the tracking of what I eat has proven this.

There are other areas of my life that are not such easy choices. Not as straight forward as whether to eat the Easter candy (child within want) or lose weight (logic). In many cases it's a choice between two wants. Or two logical options. This is when things get difficult. At one point it was financial security vs being home with the boys. Every day that I work I am still making that choice. And yes, many times there are a multitude of things to factor into the decision. It is an ever changing landscape that shapes our decisions. This is what I think makes it difficult to understand other people's decisions.

If I have learned anything in my 38 years it is that you should not judge other's decisions. There are always things you do not know. Circumstances you can not understand. Nuances you are not aware of. And above all, we are all different. We all have different priorities. We all have different histories. We all have different breaking points.

And after all of this I will still choose to eat the damn Easter candy.

What's on my mind?

Nothing profound. It's a little of this and a little of that and well, it would bore you to tears. This would be why I haven't written in a while.

Today I have decided to write anyway. More as a chance to write then to write anything specific. Below is a list! With bullets! Fun for all!

• Work has been busy as my immediate supervisor has been out.


• The second to last Life on Mars is on tonight.


• I've been knitting, knitting, knitting.


• The oldest needed cleats for baseball.


• ZJ needs new laces.


• DJ has been complaining his heel hurts for over a week now.

It took me this long to realize the pain DJ has may be related to the sneakers he's been wearing. So last night it was off to Famous Footwear after dinner. 1 pair of cleats, 1 pair of sneakers, 2 sets of laces and two sets of heel cushions seemed to fulfill everyone's needs. (buy 1, get 1 1/2 off sale = LOVE)

Being out of the house right after dinner also helped with the other thing that has been on my mind for the last 9 days. It kept me from eating. I guess the truth of the matter is something has been on my mind more than usual lately. Something I'm hesitant to talk about here. Something I'm trying to not talk about much at all. (trying not to jinx any progress I've made)

Yes, I'm trying to lose a bit of weight. Something happened this past year (I have no idea what) and now none of my clothes fit me. It's to the point that I must take it very seriously. The last time I succeeded in losing weight was about a year after the youngest was born. That would be 8 years ago for those of you not wanting to do the math. I used weight watchers on my own and got down to a weight I hadn't seen since my freshman year of college.

Not to say the clothes I wore when 20 pounds heavier fit me because - oh hell no. The skirt I wore on one of my first dates with the husband - the skirt I wore at 20 pounds heavier - still didn't fit. Seems the children spread my hips, ribs and pretty much anything else that is spreadable.

Still, I'm hoping I have the right state of mind to win the war yet again. And the one thing I have learned in all my 38 years is it is all about state of mind. Nothing more.

I'm hoping winning the war, or at least a couple more battles, will help with my exhaustion and muscle fatigue. It's one of those circles of hell. Can't exercise because of exhaustion and muscle fatigue, have more exhaustion and muscle fatigue from carrying too much weight. Basically a lose-lose situation. So I'm modifying my diet.

As always, tracking is key. And GOOD GOD do I eat a lot. Well, did eat a lot. It once again is forcing me to look at the choices I make when I eat. And, it forces me to look at how much I eat. Should I repeat? I EAT A LOT. I eat enough on an average day to support a professional athlete. Ok, I'm guessing there but seriously - FOOD, how I love thee. It amazes me how little I can live on. I kind of wish I was six feet tall just so I could eat more. Being 5'1" means I need air, 2 bites of chicken, a sip of milk and an apple to live on. My body cannot burn a pound of my favorite Carbonara. Or even a forkful for that matter. Let us just say SUCK.

So now you really know what's been on my mind. I'm not going to give you numbers. Not yet anyway. Maybe sometime in the future when I change my mind as I am apt to do. No numbers and no planned progress updates. Just obsessive filling out of my journal at everydayhealth.

What's on your mind?

I Win! The pool that is.

I officially have won the pool. The oldest is home with a fever. He came down with it last night and when I left was still sleeping. The last ill one is still coughing and complaining about a sore throat but it isn't even a little red. My guess, although he doesn't seem to want to believe me, is it is sore from coughing. Ya think? He was trying to angle staying home again but that was a no go. I shoved a bag of cough drops into his hands and told him to get to school. I predict he was fine by 9am.

The children have been angling for the various giveaway items. I know, I was shocked too. Last night the oldest grabbed the Noticeable and told me he was putting it in his room. I had to stop him and explain it was going to someone else. He looked at me like I had three heads. I explained I would buy him a replacement for him if he wanted. The one in his room ran out awhile ago and I haven't replaced it. I'm guessing this means it's time. I kind of avoid their room except for a quick tuck in at bed time and moment to flip on the light in the morning and yell, "Time to get up." Okay, truthfully, it's more like a couple of shouts over a period of 20 minutes. Still, see: AVOID.

Dylan asked to spray the air freshener all over because he looooves the smell. I vetoed that. Still, I may have to check the weight of the can when it's time to send it out and possibly replace it first. Who knows what they do when I'm not around. I'm guessing this means I can't just leave the box lying around like I'm wont to do. I will have to pack it up and hide it.

Now, enough about me,

hahahaha. Sorry. It's all about me.

Seriously though, Tide is selling t-shirts to help raise cash for a project they're doing called Tide Loads of Hope. From their website:

"Tide Loads of Hope helps in the aftermath of a natural disaster by providing clean clothes and a sense of comfort to families in need. Partnering with Feeding America, we travel to disaster affected neighborhoods with the Tide Loads of Hope truck or vans, our free mobile laundry service."

You can find out more about their work here.

I'm not sure I could fit one breast into one of their shirts but I'm thinking the 2 older boys might dig them. So support disaster relief with a tee and you can be as cool as my teen & almost teen. Come on, you know you want to.

One last thing I have to mention, every time I look out the window it is doing something else. One time - snowing. Next - sun. Next - snow. Next - cloudy and gray but no snow. For reals people. It's a little freaky.

Edited to add: The coughing child was fine once it came time to ask if a friend could come over to play basketball. In the snow.

Confessions

Okay, I caved. I watched Castle last night. And just as I feared, I like it. ABC may now commence canceling it. Well, I'm sure they'll wait until I'm in a few more episodes so as to truly hook me first. I have decided that the ABC execs are not really all about tv. They are actually preforming studies on torture. Get the masses addicted to quality programing and then replace it with crappy reality tv. It has nothing to do with ratings at all.

So another domino fell over the weekend. The sick child does not appear to have strep but a high fever, stuffy nose and aches. I'm guessing flu. Actually, he's back at school today so it's about time for the next domino to fall. Will it be the father? mother? One of the two other children that have not succumbed yet? Who knows. Maybe we should start a pool. I'll put 50 on the oldest. (That's 50 dustbunnies - the only thing I have 50 of)

One last thing, I have a confession to make...

I spent Saturday afternoon all tucked in on the couch watching bad tv and napping. I let the 2 younger children watch tv (10 y/o) and play on the computer (youngest) all afternoon. After a late night, making a HUGE breakfast for the kids and their friends and kitchen cleanup (me) and playing outside with friends all morning (kids) we had lunch and became the ultimate sloths. I cannot remember the last time I did such a thing. It was the perfect day though. The skies opened and it poured all afternoon - with flood warnings! I honestly think it has been many years since I have done such a thing while healthy. It reminded me of my childless days. That's how long it's been. And it was the first time in a long time we had nowhere to go and I didn't feel any guilt. (The guilt is what usually gets me up off the couch.)

So what did you do this past weekend? Do you love any shows I should be watching? And are you ready to place your bets?

What mind?

I was going to write about my youngest today but, well, I forgot what he said this morning that I wanted to remember. So much for using this blog as my memory. It only works when I remember something for long enough to write about it. My mind, it is going. Ha! That's optomistic.

My mind, it is gone. There, that's more accurate.

Something that is currently on my mind is the absolute torment of working at a university where I am able to take classes for free, where I am constantly working on class schedules and yet have absolutely no time to actually take a course. It's kind of like being at a buffet of all your favorite foods but you're not allowed to eat them. I keep thinking I could fit a course in if I really wanted to but then I wonder when I will do the homework, go to class, do reading and research and realize, hell, I don't even have time to grocery shop most weeks. Who am I kidding? Maybe when the kids are old enough to drive.