Wednesday, February 1, 2006

The Parenting Gods Are Laughing

IN. MY. FACE.

It's all because of this line:

"I figure we're good for a couple more months now."

I am a foolish, foolish woman.

Yesterday the first two children arrived home. We had a full schedule of homework, cub scout work, dinner making ahead. I had it all carefully orchestrated in my mind. (See how foolish?) Homework and cub scout stuff of child #2. Then the 2 littles would arrive home and we would work on their homework. (Really, I should have seen the disaster that lay ahead.) Then I would prepare dinner. Hubby home. Eat. And child #2 would go to cub scouts. I would then put the rest of the children to bed early.

All I can say is hahahahahahaha...

What really happened?

The first 2 children arrived home. They did their homework. Child #2 was heading upstairs with me to do cub scout thingies and whack! He backhanded his brother.

Why?

hmmmm... I never asked.

Result?

Child #1 was on the floor SCREAMING. Holding his EYE.

I ran over asking, "WHAT IS WRONG?"

I'm thinking, finger? Remembering the day before's broken finger. But NO.

HIS EYE.

I finally rip move his hand to reveal...

BLOOD. DRIPPING. FROM. BETWEEN. HIS. EYELIDS.

His EYE people.

Blood.

Now I don't know about you, but it freaked me the hell out.

So now I must determine where in his eye it was coming from.

Inside lid?

Possibly.

Eyeball?

We have a winner.

It came from his freaking EYEBALL.

BLOOD.

And then the door bell rang.

No, really.

It was child #2's den leader. No meeting. He's sick. Yeah, yeah, my child is BLEEDING. FROM HIS EYEBALL.

So I pushed the man out, laughed (Because it is funny. Really. A broken finger one day and a bleeding eyeball the next - funny stuff, my life.), called the doctor, gave him a paper towel to hold his eye in place catch the blood, and then called the eye doctor.

We had to rush him in because the doctor had a meeting to go to.

I left child #2 at home, called my mother (thank GOD for her) to come over, called the husband and arrived at the eye doctors in the matter of about 7 minutes. This is also the approximate time the 2 littles were due home.

On the way there I laughed (a bit maniacally) much more and then apologized to the son. Then I laughed more. COULD. NOT. STOP. This is funny. Really. Oh, and he realized he could see fine at this point. He also said he was fine. No eye doctor needed. He's fine I tell you. To which I reply, "We shall have the doctor check it anyway because IT. IS. YOUR. EYEBALL."

And then we both laughed a little.

There are more funny bits but honestly? I need a break from the drama. I also need to shove the 2 littles onto the bus in 4 minutes and they will not get dressed.

2 comments:

Cary said...

OMG I don't think I could handle a bleeding eyeball! Of course I never thought I could handle a profusely bleeding tongue as well as I did when my 2 1/2 yr old bit a half inch gash in the middle of his tongue a week ago.

It's amazing how the "Mommy adreneline" kicks in allowing to handle all kinds of emergencies.

Try to think about positive things regarding the kids and especially don't put it in writing! You should know that by now!

*whispers: I do hope you get at least a 2 month or more break from the ER

Lonna said...

My brother in law just had a similar accident... the dog scratched his eyeball. It bled so bad, my sister thought he was going to loose his eye. He went to the ER, they sent him home with some meds and it cleared up within a week. Amazing.
So glad your son is OK!