Thursday, December 18, 2008

Miracles and Madness

WARNING: Apparently 3.5 hours of sleep is not enough for my brain to function.

Yesterday I crashed my site. Complete meltdown. Nothing showing up. Nada. I spent many hours fixing what I'm sure a fourteen year old could fix in about 15 minutes. Many, many hours. As in late into the night or rather, into the early morning. I also installed WordPress. I may even like it. I can't really tell you though because my brain is not actually connected to the rest of me at the moment. And yes, I do have a 14 y/o. But my 14 y/o can't do such things because apparently when you have a mother who knows even a little bit about computers, you don't feel the need to learn anything about them yourself - much like cooking.

It seems to be up and working today. It's actually working much better than my brain. I was even an hour and a half late for work this morning (one of the 3.5 hours spent sleeping was when I am normally getting ready for work and getting the kids ready). Just know, there is not enough coffee in the world right now.

In other news, I have had my own personal Christmas miracle. I would say more but there is always the chance that one of my offspring will read this. A small chance but who wants to blow the miracle now? Just know that miracles do happen. And remind me to tell you about it after the holiday.

I seem to use the phrase, "In other news" much too often.

I have to ask, are your children, assuming you have them or have spent some time with some recently, insane? I mean really. Mine are driving me mad. They are fighting and teasing and whining and WILL. NOT. STOP. TOUCHING. EACH. OTHER. I get that they are excited but lay off already. When at least one is in tears at a near constant rate it may indicate you should leave your brothers the hell alone. For those of you who don't know what I refer to, it goes something like this:
  1. One brother (any brother) does something he knows will annoy the snot out of everyone. Or just one someone.

  2. Said brother is told to stop behavior.

  3. Repeat step 2.

  4. Repeat.

  5. First brother is attacked physically by other brother(s).

  6. Melee ensues.

  7. First brother ends up in tears.

  8. First brother tries to garner sympathy from parental units.

  9. NOTE: Step #8 NEVER works yet child keeps doing it.

  10. Repeat steps 1-9.

  11. Repeat steps 1-9 with different brother playing the part of First Brother.

  12. Repeat steps 1-11 over and over - even while parental units scream, yell, and send everyone to their rooms.

  13. And keep repeating until parental units are dead on floor from apoplexy.
There is no amount of wine that will take the edge off this chaos. Believe me, I've tried.

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