Anywayyyy, back to the update.
My mom and Zach's plane stayed in the air thanks to all of your good thoughts. I deeply appreciate it. They arrived safe and sound and last I heard were stuck in the West Palm beach traffic looking for a place to eat dinner. I'm assuming they made it to my grandmother's fed and in one piece.
A side effect of this trip though is the image I now have burned into my brain. The background of the image is that I've been selfish. When the other boys went to Florida I pumped up the trip. It was going to be FUN! and EXCITING! and they would be too busy to miss me. I sold it. Really, really sold it to them. And the consequence? They barely, if at all, missed me.
Alex was gone for 1.5 weeks. I was pregnant and at home with a 18 mo. old and a 3 year old. I was so exhausted I welcomed the break. When Tyler went? I had an infant, a 2 year old and a 6 year old. Tyler was a difficult child at this point. Excuse me, the books called it spirited. Whatever. I welcomed the 1 week break. When Dylan went he was a difficult, stubborn, defiant, tantruming exhaustion. Wait, he still can be those things. But at the time he went he was those things most of the time. Except on the 1 week trip where he was an angel and didn't want to come home. Apparently I sold it too well.
This trip I have an 11 year old, 9 year old and a 7 year old. Zach is my only one who still cuddles with me every morning. He still needs me. He still holds my hand in public and tells me he "loves me more than I can think." And I didn't do my duty to really sell the trip. I may have even mentioned I'd miss him. He may have overheard me mention that 2 weeks is a long time for him to be gone. I told him it would be fun and exciting and he would be too busy to miss me. But the capitals and exclamation points were not there. And so? His last words to me as they went through the security checkpoint were, "I'll miss you mommy." And the image seared into my brain is his little hand gripping my mom's sleeve because her hands were full. He searched for a good grip while I watched as they walked off together.
And I might be crying now. Again.
Where was I? Ah, the update.
I left the airport trying not to cry because I was now on my way to my interview. I was once again reminded why I don't typically wear mascara. Could. Not. Cry. was my mantra the whole way there. And again in the parking garage.
I went into the hospital and had a few minutes so I decided to make a pitstop. All that Mt. Dew needed to be dealt with before I sat down with a potential employer. And that is when my girly
And I did. Whew. Crisis averted. As I washed my hands I kept trying to tell myself this was a good omen. Everything was going well so far. And then I started to worry that this meant something was bound to go wrong. I dried my hands - there were even paper towels in the rest room. And quickly distracted myself out in the hall as I headed to the HR dept. There I asked about another position that was recently advertised. I was also told that one of my interviewers had stopped down for a blank application for me to fill out. But I had already done this in February so they dug it out and I was able to show up at the interview with it. Another fortuitous occurrence. I was doomed.
The interview went well. I actually interviewed with 2 people. I should know more by the end of next week or possibly the beginning of the week after. I'm hoping to get it all going by May 1st. Or SOME job by May 1st. I'd really like this one though.
On my way out I checked on my FIL. He was still in recovery so I couldn't see him. Last I heard he was resting comfortably. And by that I believe they meant he has been completely out of it. Ah, the wonders of good drugs.
And that right there seems a good spot to end this post. The wonders of good drugs... let's ponder that because I may be needing some in the next two weeks while my baby is away. Oh, and maybe I wasn't doomed. Yesterday. I don't know about today yet.